Just like family

At the golf course where I play my regular Sunday game, I've been using the same caddy for a few months now. When he's not carrying a golf bag and reading greens for expats and rich Indonesians, Ahmad is a single figure handicap golfer, so he's given me quite a few useful tips that have helped my slowly improving golf game. As a caddy, Ahmad does a pretty good job, and doesn't laugh too loudly when my wayward shots find themselves in a chocolate brown creek or in deep rough. Ahmad's one word comment, "Kalimantan", allows me to quickly ascertain my chances of finding my ball if a tee shot hooks or slices into uncharted areas away from the fairways.

Caddies at most golf courses in Jakarta don't earn much salary, with their share of the official caddy fee paid to the golf course by the player only around Rp.20,000-Rp.40,000 (US$2-$4). If they caddy six days a week they'll make less than the legislated minimum wage, so how they make a decent living is from tips they receive at the end of a round. The "recommended" tip is Rp.40,000-Rp.50,000, but many expats, including myself and other guys I know, normally tip Rp.100,000. It's not much to us, but makes a big difference to the caddy's living standards.

Given that he's caddied for me about 10 times now, Ahmad has started to try his luck financially, in the same way that household staff will hit you up for a loan or tell you tales of woe about their family in order to capture your fiscal sympathy. In recent weeks Ahmad has badgered me about his wife's hospital bills, his son's school fees, and the fact that he doesn't own a set of irons so has been renting clubs off a friend when he needs to play in competitions. I know I'm a good tipper, but this won't stop Ahmad trying this type of thing every week. One day I gave him an extra Rp.50,000 for his wife's "hospital bill", and I've also outfitted Ahmad with a new cap to replace the tattered old cap he owned when I first met him, but even though I've made it perfectly clear that I'm not going to personally sponsor his family he'll keep trying.

In a perverse way I look forward to Sunday just so I can hear Ahmad's latest financial troubles. Which, all going according to plan, he'll casually bring up in conversation while we're walking down the 18th fairway. If he weren't a golf caddy, I'm sure Ahmad could have a successful career as a civil servant, where his talent would be matched with endless financial opportunity.

It's not all bad

Since I started my blog last year I've had a few comments from readers that suggested I don't like living in Indonesia. On the contrary, I'm very much enjoying the experience of spending a few years in the midst of a different culture. And like any place in the world, there are good and not-so-good things to experience. Hopefully, regular readers of this blog will understand the humorous and satirical side of many of the posts, and realise that I do actually feel that Jakarta can be an interesting and enjoyable place to live.

I was thinking today about some of the things that are very different to what I'm used to back home in Australia, and a couple of great examples came to mind. They're both little things, but they do leave a very good impression.

The first example is what happens when you buy an item that is bulky or difficult to carry. In the West, you'd have to struggle with the package as best you can, which could mean stopping every few meters to rest, or to renew your grip or hold on the object. Here in Indonesia, the sales staff will take a lot of time and effort to package up the item, using a combination of plastic bags, baling twine, staples and packing tape, to fashion a handle to make it dead simple to carry with one hand. To me, that's excellent customer service, and is something that is unusual to find in a Western country.

The second example of Indonesian "niceness" is work related. We have a couple of hundred people working in our office, and there are two staff who are responsible for looking after the office kitchen and providing tea, coffee and drinking water for the office. Without fail, whenever there is a gathering of three of more people in a room for a meeting or informal discussion, one of the kitchen staff appear within 5 minutes, with fresh tea, coffee or water for each person. They do this without being asked, and are able to memorise every staff member's regular beverage preference. This may seem simple and quaint, but it's a very nice touch.

These are just two examples of the type of things that help to counterbalance the pollution, traffic and corruption.

The National Pastime

Because of it's widespread popularity in the US, baseball is referred to as "America's national pastime". After living in Indonesia for almost a year now, I've finally determined that Indonesia has a national pastime as well. Surprisingly, I'm not referring to corruption, nor the tendency for simple administrative processes to be as complicated and time consuming as possible.

Yes, it's clearcut. Indonesia's national pastime is transvestism. Every local television channel features sinetron (soap operas), sitcoms and variety shows that star, or are hosted by, blokes who like to dress up as women. Channel surf at any time of day or night and you'll spot an Indonesian guy camping it up as a character who would be right at home as one of the crossdressing Monty Python team or a cast member of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. Loud makeup, garish clothing and facial hair make you wonder whether Dame Edna Everage (or Boy George) have franchised their characters in this part of the world.

Given that slapstick comedy is a popular television genre here, I see a big opportunity to resurrect The Three Stooges for a comeback on Indonesian television. In drag, of course.