Sampai jumpa!

My company is sending me on to my next challenge, so we're outta here in a few days. Thank you to all the regular readers of this blog, it was fun while it lasted. Before I leave Indonesia to head off to Australia, here's a few random parting thoughts about Jakarta -

I'll miss .... affordable household staff
I won't miss .... having to manage household staff

I'll miss .... having my own driver
I won't miss .... sitting in traffic for hours every day

I'll miss .... geckos in the house
I won't miss .... mosquitoes

I'll miss .... the friendly smiles of the Indonesian people
I won't miss .... being mobbed by dozens of under-employed shop assistants in shops as soon as I enter the store

I'll miss .... the variety of great food available at reasonable prices
I won't miss .... the price of wine

I'll miss .... the vast number of great, easily accessible golf courses
I won't miss .... the lack of public parklands and footpaths

I'll miss .... Sunday brunch
I won't miss .... hotel security checks

I'll miss .... drivers who brake for cats
I won't miss .... 1500 people dying on Jakarta roads every year

I'll miss .... hot and spicy food
I won't miss .... amoebiasis

I'll miss .... the entrepreneurial spirit of the locals
I won't miss .... the corruption

I'll miss .... skintight jeans in every direction you look
I won't miss .... nipple and midriff-phobia

I'll miss .... my weekend leisure time
I won't miss .... jam karet

Proof that people actually waste time reading blogs

Some unknown insomniac nominated my blog for the Asia Blog Awards. Get out of here.

More than one way to skin a cat

One thing you learn in Jakarta is that you should never expect to travel the same route between two places on a regular basis, due to the sudden onset of roadworks, flooding, land disputes, weddings, demonstrations, truck and bus accidents, special events, or huge potholes from shoddy construction, geophysical activity or subsidence.

My daily commute to the office is around 25km, and "normally" takes around 1 hour 15 minutes, but can be as much as 3 hours due to any of the above issues. With the Governor of Jakarta pressing ahead with his misguided Busway project, several of the gridlocked city arterial roads are now missing two lanes while the dedicated Busway lanes and bus stations are constructed. Given that these lanes can't be used by any vehicles now, and won't be used by any vehicles other than TransJakarta buses once construction is completed, it's clear that the current traffic congestion is not going to be improved once the new Busway corridors are up and running.

With my daily commute bumped to 2.5 hours using any of the regular routes I've used up until now, I've had to find a new way of getting to the office, using the trial-and-error method. Fortunately I've settled on a route that gets me to the office in around the 1 hour 15 minutes that I'm used to, by following a partially completed tollroad that ends abruptly due to a long running land dispute (the tollroad was supposed to be finished in 2005). Where the tollroad turns to clay, local residents involved in the land dispute direct us to a dirt track where, for a fee of 1000 Rupiah (10 cents) we find ourselves traveling on a road parallel to the incomplete tollroad, and after a few minutes crawling through a local market and some back lanes, we arrive at my office in good time.

Having spent a week or two using the trial-and-error method of choosing a new route, it feels like somewhat of a victory to find a new route that takes less than 2 or 3 hours.

Keep Up The Great Work!

We returned to Jakarta on the weekend after a few weeks R&R in the home country, and upon our return it was wonderful to see that nothing had changed. In our absence we gave our housekeeper a list of tasks to take care of while we were away, the most important job being to ensure that the landlord arranged to have the house treated for termites (again, for the fourth time just over a year).

When we arrived home bleary eyed after a day of flying on airplanes and sitting around airports with a baby, we realized that our housekeeper managed to maintain her consistent level of performance in recent weeks –

Our floor-to-ceiling curtains, which were listed to be washed while we were away, are now somewhat-above-floor-to-ceiling curtains

With 3 weeks to organize the termite treatment, it actually took place the day before we returned, therefore a pungent cocktail of pesticide and fresh paint permeated the entire house

No dropsheets were used by the painters (or thought of by the housekeeper) who had been touching up the ceiling panels after the termite guys did their stuff, so our living room furniture is now covered in white paint splatter

I know, you're probably thinking "why don't you just get rid of her if she's that bad". Well, firstly there's no guarantee that there's anybody better out there, and secondly, her husband is our drivers, and since he's doing a great job of keeping us alive on the madhouse Jakarta roads, we'd hate to lose him.

The urinal ritual

For as long as I've been in Jakarta, this one has puzzled me, but I think I've finally cracked the mystery. When I've been draining the python at places that have Western-style individual urinals in the men's dunnies, such as hotels, shopping malls, bars and offices, I've noticed (although "noticed" is probably not the best word to use, since one does their best not to look sideways when having a squirt) that Indonesians press the flush button numerous times during the 30 seconds or so that it takes to drain the python, and this button pushing is accompanied by lots of sloshing of water with the other hand.

Female readers may prefer to hit "backspace" or click another link at this point

My initial theories were that the guys were washing their hands with the flusher before shaking hands with the wife's best friend, or flushing repeatedly to mask the sound of their own torrent or to flush away the Yellow River as quickly as possible. Without stopping to stare, or ask the question directly, I've been perplexed by this for many months.

Last week, after mulling this mystery in my head once again, the answer finally dawned on me. I believe what is actually happening is that the right hand is pressing the flush button, and the left hand is using the flowing water for personal hygiene purposes. It's really quite simple, and I have no idea why it took me so long to put two and two together.

The Indonesian Jimi Hendrix

Once a week you can drop into a small, predominantly expat bar in South Jakarta, and join the other 20 or 30 people present who are enjoying listening to and watching a world class blues guitarist by the name of Gugun performing on stage with his bassist and drummer. A lifelong disciple of Hendrix and Stevie Ray Vaughn, Gugun's setlist consists primarily of note for note versions of Jimi and SRV tunes, together with a vocal performance that is on par with the originals. An SRV-style hat and sunglasses completes the image, but this Indonesian guitarist is not a soul-less copycat trundling out benign covers of the original artists. Gugun is the real deal - a virtuoso showman who plays his ass off and never misses a beat, aided by the rest of his trio, who are also very accomplished in their respective support roles.

Gugun has played at various festivals and concerts around Indonesia, but I'm not aware if blues fans outside of Indonesia have yet had the pleasure of seeing him live. If that's the case, it's a crying shame, because Gugun would be right at home at any quality blues festival anywhere in the world. If you're ever visiting Jakarta for any length of time, I wholeheartedly recommend catching a Gugun Blues gig.

Gender inequality in Indonesia

At our company we're very fortunate to have some excellent managerial staff. They possess strength of character and common sense, are ethical, and can be relied upon to take responsibility and demonstrate leadership.

Of course, we also have managers who are at the opposite end of the leadership spectrum - lazy, lacking basic common sense, prone to fraud and corruption, have no problem solving skills, and abrogate responsibility.

The first category of manager, without exception, are female.

So, despite (or in spite of) the fact that Islamic societies appear to advantage to men over women, female managers in Indonesia have risen above that, and in this blogger's opinion (and no doubt the opinion of others) are highly preferred for senior management roles in this country.